Eden turned 100 days old this weekend!  We decided to host Eden’s 100th day celebration (baek-il) at home with family and close friends.

Baby’s 100 day mark is a big milestone in Korean culture: back in the day in Korea, many babies didn’t make it past 100 days due to harsh living conditions and widespread disease.  A baby turning 100 days old was a huge feat, and with it came feelings of hope, success, and relief.

Nowadays, the 100-day party has become an excuse to create photo-worthy backdrops, style flat lays of rice cakes and sugary goods, and take a zillion pictures to have a lot of options to later post on Instagram.  I have to admit, when it comes to occasions like this, it’s easy for me to get sucked into endless scrolls on Pinterest in search of “100 day birthday ideas” or “baby birthday decor.”  I get caught up in a desire to impress others or do things a certain way just because others are doing it.

Conoon and I aren’t the type to host wedding-level parties for baby occasions, but I do like to host humble get-togethers (that are still picture-worthy) with loved ones when we hit little or big milestones.  I’m always down for an excuse to host parties (especially if they’re themed) and eat good food.

So how do I do this without going overboard and staying within budget?  I remember to take a step back and focus on the significance of the occasion.  I differentiate between the things I want versus what I need and make compromises.  I ask family and friends for help when I need it, and keep things simple but still picture-ready.

To think that I have survived being a mom for 100 days is crazy!  Okay, maybe not crazy, but a little bit jarring.  I think about all the things I’ve done as a mom in every single one of those hundred days and I am in awe.  I can definitely attest to what parents mean when they say that the days feel long but years feel short.  Though we haven’t made it to a year yet, I can say that these last three months really do feel like they flew by.

At 100 days, I still haven’t got the hang of being a mom.  I say “still” as if there’s some mom handbook out there that says I should be meeting a certain standard of readiness or accomplishment by a certain time.  But I know that doesn’t exist.  I know I’m being hard on myself, and that the language I use affects my thoughts and therefore my actions.  There are days I feel super victorious and accomplished and proactive… and then there are days I want to throw my face into a pillow and cry.  Maybe having all these feelings are a part of momhood, and that a lack of a bad day doesn’t mean that I’ve got it all down as a mom.  Maybe feeling productive and crossing off all my to-do’s in a day doesn’t necessarily make me a good mom either.

What makes a “good” mom?  No answer is alike, just like how there’s no mom or child that are exactly alike.  All moms are on their own unique paths to figuring out how to be the best mom for their LOs, and as long as you’re doing the best you can, you can definitely call yourself “good”.